My First Official Day As A Real Golfer

Mom and Dad told me that golf is a humbling sport and that I have much to learn... so I thought it was only fitting then to combine pictures of my first day on the golf course with a collection of famous (and infamous) golf quotes

Chubbs: Golf's no different from Hockey. It requires talent and self discipline.
Happy Gilmore: Golf requires goofy pants and a fat ass. You should talk to my neighbor, the accountant. Probably a great golfer... huge ass

What other people may find in poetry or art museums, I find in the flight of a good drive. ~Arnold Palmer

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The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing. ~Phyllis Diller

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Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five. ~John Updike
Cinderella story. Outta nowhere. A former greenskeeper, now, about to become the Masters champion. It looks like a mirac... It's in the hole! It's in the hole! It's in the hole! ~ Carl Spackler

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Happy: Hey what are you doing now? You want to get some food?
Virgina: Oh, no thanks. I don't date golfers.
Happy: Oh, good, because I'm a hockey player.
Judge Smails: Ty, what did you shoot today?
Ty Webb: Oh, Judge, I don't keep score.
Judge Smails: Then how do you measure yourself with other golfers?
Ty Webb: By height.

And finally...


Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Well, I tend to think of the golf swing as a poem.
The critical opening phrase of this poem will always be the grip. Which the hands unite to form a single unit by the simple overlap of the little finger. Lowly and slowly the clubhead is led back. Pulled into position not by the hands, but by the body which turns away from the target shifting weight to the right side without shifting balance. Tempo is everything; perfection unobtainable as the body coils down at the top of the swing. There's a slight hesitation. A little nod to the gods.
Dr. Molly Griswold: A, a nod to the gods?
Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Yeah, to the gods. That he is fallible. That perfection is unobtainable. And now the weight begins shifting back to the left pulled by the powers inside the earth. It's alive, this swing! A living sculpture and down through contact, always down, striking the ball crisply, with character. A tuning fork goes off in your heart and your balls. Such a pure feeling is the well-struck golf shot. Now the follow through to finish. Always on line. The reverse C of the Golden Bear! The steel workers' power and brawn of Carl Sandburg's. Arnold Palmer!
Romeo Posar: Unnhh, he's doing the Arnold Palmer thing.
Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: End the unfinished symphony of Roy McAvoy.